What Is Marital Counseling
Marital counseling is therapy conducted by a licensed mental health professional to help married couples address conflicts, improve communication, and work toward resolution of their relationship issues. In the context of divorce proceedings, marital counseling serves a distinct purpose: it creates a documented record of whether both parties genuinely attempted reconciliation before filing or finalizing separation.
Legal Relevance in Divorce Proceedings
Several states recognize marital counseling as evidence of good faith effort in divorce cases. In some jurisdictions, courts may order or encourage couples to attend counseling sessions before granting a divorce decree. For example, some states with "cooling-off periods" of 30 to 90 days recommend using that time for therapeutic intervention. If reconciliation is genuinely attempted and documented, it can influence how judges view custody arrangements and spousal support awards, particularly in cases where one party contests the divorce or custody terms.
The counselor's notes become part of your divorce record. If you later dispute custody arrangements or support obligations, these sessions demonstrate you took steps to preserve the marriage. Courts view this favorably when evaluating parental fitness or reasonable accommodation of the other spouse's relationship with children.
Marital Counseling vs. Divorce Coaching
Marital counseling focuses on the relationship itself, while a Divorce Coach helps individuals navigate the separation process, property division, and filing requirements. Some people pursue counseling early in separation hoping to reconcile. Others work with a divorce coach to prepare for inevitable settlement negotiations or custody disputes. You can do both, though they serve different functions in your case.
Documentation and Costs
Sessions typically cost $100 to $300 per hour, depending on the therapist's credentials and location. Therapists licensed as LMSWs, LMFTs, or psychologists all qualify. When filing divorce papers in most states, you may need to declare whether you attempted counseling. In some jurisdictions, this affects filing fees or required waiting periods.
Keep records of all session dates and the therapist's professional credentials. If custody disputes arise later, these documents prove your involvement in good-faith conflict resolution efforts.
Common Questions
- Can my spouse refuse to attend counseling? In most states, you cannot force participation. However, a judge can recommend or order attendance in some cases, particularly when minor children are involved and custody is contested. Courts view refusal to attempt reconciliation as relevant to character assessments in custody decisions.
- Does marital counseling delay my divorce? It depends on your state's laws. If your jurisdiction requires a waiting period, counseling can occur during that time. Otherwise, counseling happens on your schedule and does not automatically extend filing timelines, though it may delay reaching settlement if reconciliation becomes possible.
- What if the counselor documents that reconciliation is impossible? This actually strengthens your divorce case by proving both parties engaged in good faith. Courts respect professional assessments that reconciliation is not viable, and this supports fair division of property and custody arrangements without prolonged litigation.